Thursday, July 11, 2019

I Must be Missing Something...

by Nina

I'm thinking I simplify life too much... However, given how very complicated life,... my life is, taking a lighter view; some may believe is a coping mechanism. 

It is not. 

Complicating ones life is the coping mechanism - the crutch. 

Imploding/complicating our lives with stuff... needless stuff in an effort to enjoy life with all the padding of the stuff - all the while, the only thing someone might be successful in doing is avoiding the touch of life - the true experience of life... all because of it's cold, ugly harshness. 

Sadly, in surrounding ourselves with stuff to avoid life, we also avoid...miss, the great things of life - the less is more, the common, the small... quiet that comes from simplifying.

Since my last posting at the turn of the new year, I've made some life changes. 

I've moved and I've retired, kinda; both events have created a re-evaluation of self and stuff. I've had to purge - but this is good. Thank God for external hard drives - so the electronic purge really was more virtual... I yet have ALL of those lesson plans... and pictures of student artifacts, (but who really cares?)...And I had so much other tangible stuff that went off to the Salvation Army... I'm ashamed to admit... at least 5 car loads - I should have rented a van. How did I get so much stuff?

As with my first move that I blogged about - moving exposes who we are for all to see... Fortunately, this move was more planned than my first and not under duress. Still my routines changed as I had to fit into my new space. The bureau, where I used to put my keys and glasses when arriving home, is not close to the front door... so where are these important items going to go so I can find them? New routine.  My old stuff,  the stuff I kept, was sitting in a new space. 

I had to shift... I had to simplify. I had to re-evaluate...

On top of purging old stuff I had to purge who I was...re-evaluate...re-define.

I will always be a daughter, mom, sister, aunt, cousin,... friend ... student, teacher, ... Roles change... I don't think I've purged these roles. They are a part of who I am... They are a part of the mix of the new me. But, change they do... 

Wife of 36 years became ex-wife of 3 years and counting. 
Teacher of nearly 19 years became retired teacher, now adjunct professor, (second time around). 
Nina of 60 years became Nina, whatever the good Lord has for me... (this has always been).

Sadly, in my years of teaching and living life; I have seen folks, myself included, chasing after stuff that will validate who we are - the padding that makes us believe we are ok, we are good, we are more than enough, more than we think we actually are... When Jesus has been saying all along... "Only One thing is needful", ... Mary has chosen that which is most important... 

One thing is needful - Jesus!

Simple!

Jesus is saying YOU are enough as you are... and I, (Jesus), am enough for you.

Too simple?

Scary simple.

It's scary simple because of the simplicity. We'd rather allow the world resound in our ears saying you need more, you must have more, you must be more... you are not enough...

Lies.

These lies create longings and most recently I've discovered - they create games that people play, so they can get more, (aka manipulation)... and leave you with less...  

Aside: (A little secret - I am very naive - one would think I lived a cloistered life - I kinda did for nearly 50 years - I closed myself off from the world - didn't really engage... Stayed in the bubble... Read my postings it's all woven throughout each one, but God redeems everything - even burst bubbles and mends the brokenhearted).

People rather complicate life with unbelievable selfish games so that they have the illusion of having the most - the most that does not satisfy but only is successful in creating an insatiable longing for more and so complicating life...more...

It's cyclical. 

Heck, I got off that treadmill. 

Why don't you?

Simple is better.


Soli Deo Gloria,
Nina